The Codex of Zuka

[Squidslinger Gilder]

"A supernova is when a massive star explodes leaving behind a white dwarf or a black hole and sometimes spawns a nebula which brings forth new life as new stars are born. A Zukanova is when Zuka farts in the tub."
"There is a theory that the entire universe is the result of a single massive Zukanova."
"There is another theory that proposes the idea that dark matter is actually Zukasauce leftover from the great Big Zukanova."
"Zuka doesn't answer questions about the Zukanova. He's too bashful to admit it actually happened."

[Squidslinger Gilder]

"Early Alpha versions of matchmaking was actually called "Matchzukaing." The name was changed after testers developed an unhealthy taste for sauce and Muse devs invented the Zuka Class which made it impossible for pilots, engineers, and gunners to ever get into a match."
"Zuka Class officially was scrapped but it is still secretly in development with Muse funneling millions of gallons of Zukasauce into it. They are determined to balance it and give all classes a reason to exist. They forget the laws of Zukadynamics!"
"One does not balance Zuka, he balances you. Then you become one with the Zuka, all is saucy bliss." - From the Laws of Zukadynamics

[Spud Nick]

The Zuka Sauce Factory was shut down this year when government officials discovered the secret ingredient was Zuka.

[Squidslinger Gilder]

The Zuka Sauce Factory was shut down this year when government officials discovered the secret ingredient was Zuka.

[Squidslinger Gilder]

"If two Zukas are in equilibrium with a third Zuka, you have reached the point of Thermal Zukalibrium and Zukasauce production can occur. Zuka is the only being in existence able to do this by himself." -A law of Zukadynamics
"Zuka once attempted to attain Zukalibrium with others. The end result was the very first Creepy Zukadoll."
"Many years ago there was an uncomfirmed report of an emergency recall of Creepy Zukadolls after they were placed together in a toy store and ended up attempting Zukalibrium. Studios deny it but if you play the Toy Story movies backwards you get to see the original security footage of the attempted doll Zukalibrium."
"Rumor has it that had the doll Zukalibrium not been stopped, it would have caused a mass extinction event and Creepy Zukadolls would have become the dominant life on the planet."

[Squidslinger Gilder]

"Besides Creepy Zukadolls, Zuka also developed a line of Tickle-Me-Zuka dolls. The only tickle-me doll that would actually tickle back, and more!"
"Tickle-Me-Zuka dolls were surprisingly popular among adults with female consumers generating a 500% increase in sales each year until the doll was discontinued."
"Zuka discontinued the Tickle-Me-Zuka when he realized the dolls became self aware and were attempting to overthrow Zuka's harem."
"Most Tickle-Me-Zukas were confiscated and scrapped, however some escaped into the backwoods behind Zuka's house and since then, sightings have popped up in rural areas all across the nation."
"They say if you're camping in the woods and you hear a girlish giggle echo from the shadows, its already too late. Pray you have Zukasauce."

[Squidslinger Gilder]

"Rival studios in the 90s, looking to capitalize on the TMNT fame, started developing for new ideas to dethrone the turtles. One of them was Teenage Mutant Ninja Zukas. However the project was shelved after Zuka insisted Zukanardo's catch phrase be,"Hey you wanna see the secret of my ooze?"
"Unfortunately the project could not be halted long as Zuka already developed a line of feminine hygiene products around the ooze."
"TMNZ, despite loads of hype and branding, sadly never could get into full production. Zuka's demands were just too great for writers and directors and Zuka was often seen chasing interns through the sets with hygiene products."
"Hope for TMNZ has not been lost as Zuka has recently released a new line of animatronic talking hygiene products. Modeled in his likeness. They are programed to ask the user if they want his ooze and giggle whenever left alone in the dark for too long."

[HamsterIV]

Michael Bay was approached about rebooting the TMNZ franchise however contract negotiations fell through when Zuka insisted that Zuka sauce be used instead of gasoline for Michael Bay's trade mark fire balls. While Zuka was capable of furnishing enough Zuka Sauce the International War Crimes Tribunal stepped in and indicated atomized Zuka Sauce is a more powerful chemical weapon than Mustard gas.

Megan Fox went missing after her first reading of her script. Creepy Zuka dolls are suspected of being involved.

[HamsterIV]

* The Minotaur was the result of a failed experiment to weaponize Zuka's pelvic thrusts.
* An algorithm designed by Zuka was used in an early version of match making, however too many players ended up leaving the game having found their soul mates through Zuka's algorithm.
* Zuka's soul is so great that it can mate with ten other souls at once, usually leaving the other souls exhausted but satisfied.
* Zuka can unbalance a match from the spectator slot.
* Zuka's can't use Match Making since his Match Making Rank is "Divide by Zero Error."

[Koali]

This isn't quite related, but...

ZUKA. The Hwacha is on fire. AGAIN. FIX IT.

(Reference to a match where we crewed together on a Spire.)

[Indreams]

Zuka was just too hot for that Hwacha. 

*No gun is good enough for Zuka.
*Minotaur, created to mimic Zuka's pelvic motion, came close. But when Zuka got on the Minotaur, the synergy violated the virgin fabric of the universe. Muse had to nerf the Minotaur.

[Koali]

So is Zuka kinda like some sort of sexual tyrannosaurus, or...?

[David Dire]

So is Zuka kinda like some sort of sexual tyrannosaurus, or...?

I believe.



Like me.Just saying that because it's a fun name

[Indreams]

Stop Corrupting the Codex of Zuka with questions!

*Zuka is the only being that cannot be swallowed by kirby.
*If kirby somehow managed to swallow Zuka, every game made by Nintendo will receive an R-rating due to association.
*Zuka was to make a guest appearance in Smash Brothers, but the idea was pulled back for the "sake of the children".
*Zuka has yet to meet Indreams. If Zuka met Indreams, Indreams' nights will be filled with euphoric, debauched nightmares.

[Koali]

I REJECT MY PREVIOUS STATEMENT

ZUKA IS NOT A SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS

THE SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS IS ZUKA