I never say things like that aboard. I always explain how things work the best I can. Only if somebody goes full retarded by not taking what I asked for - I go FULL sarcastic. Usually it turns out that AI work better than such people. I always try to encourage people's efforts.
So far I had only one guy who pissed me off to the point I suddenly said "SCREW IT. I'M STOPPING HERE. WE'RE NOT MOVING ANYWHERE, BECAUSE FUCK THAT GUY".
The said bastard came as a second gunner (all heil the almighty matchmaker). I recommended him and engineer loadout I needed. He declined me and IMMEDIATELY blocked me. The said dense motherfucker not only did not bring what I needed him to bring, he also blocked so I couldn't give him orders or any fucking piece of advice. What's more - he was badly disrupting work of literally everyone.
So I said: "FUCK YOU". This shithead even tried to reclaim the helm.
And finally I started to whine on match chat how screwed this dograpist is, when all of the sudden - HE UNBLOCKED ME.
AND I KNEW HIS OMNIPRESENT WRATH AS HE STARTED CALLING ME A NOOB AND A RAGEKID.
Thank God this trollcrap had left soon after that. Thanks to this I was able to do the come back from 3-0 to 3-5. Goddammit.
Soooo, will anyone else try to tell me we have no reason to hate new players? Of course that not all of them. And it's not like I greet them with "Fuck off, come no sooner you have 100 matches" (Mr.Disaster). But if somebody says that we have absolutely no reason to do so, I will probably shiv the bastard.
When someone declines your loadout you should always try to explain him why his setup is detrimental. Generally I have this problem occur with 2 gunner situations, so I just give them engi and tell em they have the second gun (There's always a second gun..) which I find is a good incentive to get them on engi.
If they block you, or simply keep declining or cussing at you (D'aww, cusses) report, block and leave. I've tried going spectator to stop the match timer afew times, but mostly MM finds another cap to take your spot, which happens to be one of the problems with the match timer :/
EDIT on Pies: Oh yes, that's a very true fact that I personally experience on occassion aswell. The problem is whenever I crew I mostly get to serve under fairly new captains who easily screw up the match for us, which is a bit of a drive that keeps me on pilot. This is a teamwork reliant game alright, a ship cant function too well if the crew arent doing their job decently alright, but there's always that one cog in the machine that controls the approach and outcome...
There's nothing special about shooting gatling, as long as you live up to what your captain expects of you (decent aim and tracking) your armor breaks wont be any inferior to a vet's. As long as you, on the mortar, have a feel for its physics and you know when to fire it, you'll one clip ships like any vet.
But the difference between a decent and a good pilot is the latter will actually know gun arcs to the heart, approach accordingly to get the best of them, and manouver out of a bad situation to save their team a point. Meanwhile, a pilot with much lesser degree of skill might fly above with a carronade, ram junkers with their pyra's pointy balloon at full speed without breaking hull (I used to do this all the time) and turn a full 180 in the face of the enemy in an attempt to dust off when their ally is killed.
TL DR: Crew lives up to expectations, captain aspires to be the best/is the best and the match is over with a 5-0 ish victory.
Oh and, ceres jumps in and explains my point while I'm writin, gg