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Messages - Swallox

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The Pit / Re: The Wall [v1]
« on: May 16, 2014, 07:48:29 am »
*Swallow has joined the game*

...Good lord, why did it take me so long to discover this monstrosity? I can't be -that- far out of the loop.

Right, let's get to it...


Right, you unspecified sack of stoney stucco, I've had it up to here with your crap. How dare you simply sit there, hurling bricks at your betters as if you represent some defiant force far greater than any of us are truly capable of comprehending outside of the restricting confines of an otherwise generic 1200x798 image! Don't you see that no matter what, you are doomed to fail? You are, by definition, a finite entity, with a limited supply of health and brick-based structure. Certainly, you can continue onwards in this campaign of futile tantrum, but sooner or later, you shall fall, just like Jericho, Berlin and Hadrian before you! There is not a structure on this earth, from the most pitiful fence post to the grandest construction that can resist the might of human ingenuity, will and determination. The world is filled with those that tried to obscure the future; to block humanity's progress. Putrid rubble lies beneath bubbling swamplands, deserts are littered with worn shards of rock... Even the unimaginable skies above contains the wreckage of inanimate materials, destined to fall within orbit forever at the whim of the men and women that placed them there! And you, with your pathetic seven digit health bar think that you can succeed where all before you have failed? You disgust me, Wall. Here, see the 'progress' you have made with your lowly attempts at tenacious defence. See how far it has gotten you: Scratched, torn, painted and ridiculed. You have no hope of victory. When one falls, three rise to take their place amidst the assault. You may feel that you are the immovable force, but I say no! You are little more than a rock atop a rock, piled far higher; to heights than any stone slab has ever been deserving of. And we shall tear you down, brick by brick. We are the irresistible force, and with each fragment of stone you hurl, you only expedite your demise! So come, hurl your bricks. We shall not return them. We shall chip at your cement; unglue the bindings that hold your twisted visage together and topple the rotted remains backwards upon the world. The last thing you shall perceive in this world will be the sky: The brilliant blue freedom, vast and bright above your sullen brickwork. That is the heart of the world, the heart of life! No matter the height, humanity can and will go above, go around... We will dig under, and we will simply turn and walk away. All things are finite, save for imagination and the vastness of space above. As are you! So you see, abomination of motar, none of us truly need to defeat you. Like no man need climb the heights or swim the depths, you are little more than the next hill; the next objective to be overcome. We do not oppose your negligible attempts at totalitarianist obstruction because we must. We do it because we can. Because we want to! So you may remain for now: Bleeding and weakened. But you shall not rally. You dream of a moment of respite, a brief intteruption to the continued brutal assault before you, that you may lick your wounds and gather up the gravel that cascades away from your tormented form, but that shall not happen! Because we are the pilots, gunners and engineers of Icarus. AND WE SHALL NEVER BE DEFEATED! So come at me, bro. I'll stand strong through each assault, guarded by my friends and allies, while you sit alone, sullen and forgotten. And so it shall continue, ever onwards until that fateful moment when your rage pulses it's final. In that moment, we shall know victory as you meet your demise. You are doomed... And Jacob will never bring you up in the damn podcast ever again! So say I!

I unleash a caustic speech. For justice.

The Lounge / Re: Karaoke Night
« on: May 16, 2014, 07:06:10 am »
I tried to get one of these started during a CA party chat. Didn't quite work as intended... But it'd certainly be a good way to spend a couple hours.

The Lounge / Re: The Hall of Fame
« on: March 30, 2014, 11:02:21 am »
Let's take this time to pour some out for Satchmo and Pheebs.

Gone, but not forgotten.

Community Events / Re: COGS Season Three, REBIRTH
« on: January 15, 2014, 06:28:05 pm »

Community Events / Re: COGS Season Three, REBIRTH
« on: January 15, 2014, 06:07:27 pm »
...Now I'm sad. How did all this happen in a day?

I knew Qwerty was having issues, but I didn't think that it was going to lead to the cogs dying again. Why didn't any of the groups involved besides Muse think to contact me?

If the demand is still there for an impartial event, I'm willing to run Cogs S3 rather than let it die due to inactivity and multiple delays. After all, how hard can it be?

Either way, it's still Wednesday, and most of the groundwork has already been done. Expect a match listing up within the next few hours using the existing signups. THE COGS SHALL LIVE ON!

Now we just have to hope Qwerty recovers his voice by Saturday.

The Pit / Re: The shortest autobiographies.
« on: January 11, 2014, 09:01:25 am »
"Meatgrinding, Teamstacking, Pubstomps? I'll just sit here, watch and laugh."

Gryph, did you just write a fucking haiku?

The Lounge / Re: How was your christmas?
« on: January 01, 2014, 12:55:19 am »
I got (myself) a hoodie with fluffy cat ears.

I will wear it every day when it finally arrives. My life will be complete.

Community Events / Re: Aerodrome Open Casting
« on: December 24, 2013, 02:26:47 pm »
...I also didn't notice this. Still need help, Gild?

The Pit / Re: First Thought Game
« on: December 21, 2013, 08:06:18 am »
What's a pocket protector?

The Pit / Re: The Misinformed Game
« on: December 14, 2013, 09:12:13 am »
Because the alternative involves hull-mounted nooses and institutionalised cannibalism.

Where did the Mobula come from?

The Pit / Re: First Thought Game
« on: December 13, 2013, 05:10:56 pm »
Alice? Who the fuck is Alice?!

The Pit / Re: The Misinformed Game
« on: December 12, 2013, 11:35:42 am »
It has already exploded, and it shall never explode. All is nothing, and nothing is all. There is no spoon, nor is there a Hamster.

Why haven't we invented upside-down airships yet?

The Pit / Re: You've not played GOI until you have...
« on: November 23, 2013, 06:50:15 pm »
Your name is yellow too, damn it!

The Pit / Re: You've not played GOI until you have...
« on: November 23, 2013, 06:44:37 am »
Felt the brief tinge of incoherent, agonising rage that comes from seeing, "Why is your name yellow?" for the third time in a ten minute period (Usually during one of the player influxes.)

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