Guns Of Icarus Online
Off-Topic => The Pit => Topic started by: David Hark on September 29, 2013, 03:58:25 pm
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1. Blame Shink.
2. David Hark is always right.
3. Flak-fish don't work.
4. If you think David Hark is wrong, see rule 2.
5. Don't ram Galleons.
6. Lochnagar all the things!
7. Stay in the trenches! Don't go over the top!
8. Don't die.
9. Don't steal my kills!
10. Don't steal a man's Lochnagar kills!
11. Don't board the enemy ship.
12. Remember what happened to Georgia.
13. Remember to load your gun!
14. Keep an eye on your allies.
15. Fargo is bored.
16. Don't question Fargo.
17. Don't question the high level guys.
18. Don't make horrible puns unless it's about Jon Snow.
19. Screw the rules, I'm in command!
20. There are too many rules.
21. Lehran is the rocketeer
22. When a captain isn't listening, crew are allowed to spam non-verbal commands.
23. Two phoenix claws are better than one.
24. The floor IS lava, yes even in water hazard.
25. Kill them before they kill us.
26. When in doubt, keep shooting.
27. Don't get off your gun to fix things, just keep shooting.
28. Oh my god! Keep shooting!
29. Vote for Fjords.
30. HULL! HULL! HULL!!!
31. Not knowing the rules results in non-verbal command spamming.
32. Don't jump off the ship.
33. Invoke 27, 28, and 30 simultaneously, yes you must adhere to multiple contradicting rules at once.
34. There is no rule 34.
35. Don't listen to David Hark.
36. You can't spot with chem spray Fargo.
37. Watch for the magic smoke to appear.
38. Bright clouds always need more flares.
39. When in doubt, back up!
40. BALLOON!!!
41. Reserved to address anything that seems important at the moment.
42. There is no spoon.
43. There is a knife of lies.
44. The clouds will always block your spot, no matter how little they cover the enemy ship.
45. BUT MY ACHIEVEMENT!
46. Join the damn party!
47. No Poofters!
48. The lobbies die quickly.
49. Ramming is always an option.
50. You must face this challenge alone...
51. Know your key bindings!
52. You aren't allowed to question the legitimacy of the rules.
53. FOOL!
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I did really enjoy making all these rules.
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54. FARGO, MY ENGINES
55. DO NOT FIRE AN OFFENSIVE FLARE, FARGO!
56. WHY WOULD YOU IGNORE MY ENGINES TO GET ON THE HULL, FARGO?!?!?
57. FARGO, WHY AREN'T YOU ON THE HULL?!?!?
58. THAT HULL SHOULD NEVER BE ON FIRE, FARGO
Every time Fargo's on my ship, but without the yelling.
Ok, I do yell at him about offensive flares and engines. But that's it :D
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We need to create a much larger rule, like, Rule 234: Skywhales Exist. Now everyone has to make up rules for all the prior spots.
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1. Blame Shink.
you just had to make this #1 didn't you?..... One of these days, I'll engineer for you.....
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1. Blame Shink.
naturally
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... but what happened to Georgia? Would someone please tell me what happened to Georgia?
;D
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the blame shink rule was my idea accualy
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... but what happened to Georgia? Would someone please tell me what happened to Georgia?
;D
Trust me! You -don't- want to know what happened to Georgia! Just conserve your jetpack fuel!
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... but what happened to Georgia? Would someone please tell me what happened to Georgia?
;D
Trust me! You -don't- want to know what happened to Georgia! Just conserve your jetpack fuel!
:D
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Edit #1:
Twinkie D-Lite's 3 requested rules:
59. You must be a level 3 pilot to fly a galleon.
60. If you have a galleon with 4 manticores, don't contact Twinkie, Twinkie will contact you.
61. Don't invite a person to your game and then ask them to change classes.
Further rules added:
62. If you swear, you must put one achievement in the swear jar. the jar goes to the captain at the end of the match.
63. The Bad Idea Subsection:
63.1. Point Blank with a Typhon Heavy Flak Cannon is a bad idea. (Unless in compliance with rule #6)
63.2. Point Blank with a Lumberjack Heavy Mortar is a bad idea. (Unless in compliance with rule #6)
63.3. Long range with a Hellhound Heavy Twin Carronade is a bad idea.
63.4. Double-anything on the front of a pyramidion is a bad idea.
63.4.1. With the possible exception of the Hades Light Cannon.
63.4.2. With the possible exception of the Whirlwind Light Gatling Gun if in compliance with rule #49.
63.4.3. Possibly not a bad idea if you have a REALLY good teammate.
63.5. It is a bad idea to cite rule 63 subsections whilst in the middle of combat.
63.6. It is a bad idea to believe that rule 63 subsections are all you need to remember from "Da Rules of Guns of Icarus", they are all equally important.
63.7.1.a. It is a bad idea to put David Hark in charge of Rule making.
64. Dr. Trager is a drunk.
65. Drugs are bad m'kay.
66. Spamming chat only gets you banned.
67. Advertising in chat is different from spamming chat.
68. Nobody ever expects the Spanish Inquisition.
69. PULL OUT!
70. If someone suggests a crazy gamemode, it is your duty to help them realize this goal should they want to actually pursue it.
70.1. If an existing lobby does not wish to comply with a request for some crazy gamemode, it is their job to explain to the requestee how to start a lobby.
70.2. If the majority of the lobby wants to pursue this gamemode, you should either give it a try too or find a new lobby.
71. It is important to listen to the rule-makers.
Revisions/addendum to existing rules:
34.1. If it exists, there's a steam-punk version of it.
49.1. Why yes Horatio, I will ram.
234.1 Skywhale Hunting is a real sport.
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42. There is no spoon.
I feel gravely offended
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42. There is no spoon.
I feel gravely offended
I see you are liking my addition to the list, Sarge.
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42. There is no spoon.
I feel gravely offended
I see you are liking my addition to the list, Sarge.
Gravely
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42. There is no spoon.
I feel gravely offended
I see you are liking my addition to the list, Sarge.
Gravely
2 deep 17 me
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42. There is no spoon.
2 deep 17 me
I feel gravely offended
I see you are liking my addition to the list, Sarge.
Gravely
52
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71. When unsure which rule to apply, always refer to rule 1.
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72. When in doubt, summon RethBurn.
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73. When RethBurn is in doubt, panic.
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74. Don't Panic.
75. Always carry a towel.
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76. Remember to slur your euphemisms for the report-happy people.
77. If you are more than two level 7+ playing together, the enemy team will accuse you of stacking
77. 1. Disregard flamers, acquire stacks
78. Article 77, subsection 1 applies to any ship with a flamer and a flare gun aswell.
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79. just burn it.
80. Always double check your customization!
81. Don't worry, Magellan has an ointment for that.
82. Fix your damn internet connection
82.1. Don't use a wireless connection to play Guns of Icarus!!!
82.2. Dishonor on you if you use wireless.
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83. Rules 84-89 are banned by the Geneva Convention (don't ask how, I'm still working on figuring that out), and are therefore redacted from the ruleset.
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90. Any request to change loadouts directed at a Cake in full-fire mode will be be happily heard and even more happily ignored.
90.1 Rule 90 is negated if you request more fire.
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91. When fighting cake, bring Chemical Spray and sniper ship loadouts.
91.1 Rule 91 does not apply when using Squid Mine-layers.
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92. Cake still has mines, GG HB.
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93. Follow rule 91 subsection 1 and wallow in your sorrow.
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94. Win or lose against Cake, and enjoy your birthday.
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95. Da Rules of Guns of Icarus is not to be used to settle clan disputes.
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95.1 this excludes rules 90-94.
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96. Rule 96 does not apply to anybody except Zuka, though he has the ability to bypass it.
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97. Abandoning a match because you screwed up is VERY bad reason.
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98. Get back in formation Leeroy Jenkins!
99. Oh God did he just go in?
100. Stick to the plan guys.
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Rule 101: There is no boarding.
Rule 102: There will not be boarding.
Rule 103: No, your idea for boarding will not change the fact that there is no boarding.
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Rule 101: There is no boarding.
Rule 102: There will not be boarding.
Rule 103: No, your idea for boarding will not change the fact that there is no boarding.
Why didn't I think of these sooner? XD
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Rule 101: There is no boarding.
Rule 102: There will not be boarding.
Rule 103: No, your idea for boarding will not change the fact that there is no boarding.
104: Continuing to do so will result in your untimely disappearance.
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97. Abandoning a match because you screwed up is VERY bad reason.
97.1 Exception: Abandoning a match so you can rejoin with the right equipment/class
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105. The only thing better than one mine is 200 mines.
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105.1: The only thing better than 200 mines is 200 Lochnagar mines
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106. The only thing better than 200 Lochnagar mines is an all mine Mobula with crew carrying all Loch, and using it to win Cogs.
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107. Blame Gaben
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108. Gaben Loves you
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109: Gaben eats for your sins, so you can stay slim and pure.
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110. Keep telling Rethburn he has to join the TFD.
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111. Never forget to invite Jawjee to this kind of topics
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112. never let qwerty join the ducks.
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113. When Qwerty is happy, remind him of the Oval ship.
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114. Never let the Gents get in a cloud. They will stay there and camp.
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115. a)Never blame Coldcurse for his harsh words.
115. b)Only blame Coldcurse if you consider joining the TFD.
(Come on Brick, come and blame me. I have a nice spot reserved for you in TFD :D)
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115. a)Never blame Coldcurse for his harsh words.
116. Always blame Jawjee for that, or Shink, because Shink is the guy that gets blamed because he's Shi-...Fine, I'll stop.
117.If you have the chance to ram a galleon with your pyramidion, ALWAYS go full speed backwards into a rock, because that's what cool people do.
118.Make sure that "cool" doesn't mean retarded.
119.Always imply that your enemy are cool.
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120. If you might be camping in a cloud don't forget the large chest of assorted tea.
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121. destroy all the Tea.
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121a. No tea for coldcurse :(
121b. Respect other clans "things"
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122. the Gents will show more respect towards TFD.
(happy now?)
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123. Never remove breadcrumbs, flames or tea as a rule.
Respect takes long to earn, but can be lost in an instant. It is never given away, but we do try show respect. Your rule for removing tea was not appropriate imho. But it is the pit so whatever.
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124.long live the pit
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125. The pit does not create horrible things, it incubates it.
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126. do not kill the pit before it has layed it's eggs.
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126.1 The pit lays it's eggs every October and incubates them till March. Provide ample pitage during this time.
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126.2 When the offspring reaches 6 months they are fully mature and will spread to other threads, derailing them and then returning in the 7nth month to lay eggs.
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126.3 in case of fire, save the eggs. leave Rethburn and Piemanlives behind.