The Crow of Midnight, Converter of Europe, Unifier of Scandinavia, Germania, Southern and Western Europe, Sky Emperor of Ming, Conquistador Supreme of the New World, Colonizer of Australia, Puncher of Cangaroos, Unifier of Terra.
But then God said "Oi m8, a happy, unified and strong world is boring, why don'tcha just let them humans screw around? If ya stay 'ere just a millennia more we can hang out and shitpost on Godnet."
I just answered "Fair enough."
And so here I am, after dooming the world to live this timeline. But at least the shitposting was fun.
Have you administered the Rites of Well Functioning to your computer today?