Short answer: Players don't care and it's not really their job to care. They want to compete in a serious manner and are annoyed when they are unable to, whether it's because of ally or because of enemy.
Long answer: I wonder what kind of harrasment was that, because "please, don't pilot as gunner" is not a harrassment for me
But people are fine with people playing not so well if they are willing to learn and listen to advice and they are not complete morons. Becuase, yeah, sometimes just that lvl6 captain thinks he's so pr0 lgbt that he can take on 2-3 ships on his own.
OH LOOK IT DOESN'T WORK. I GOTTA DO THIS AGAIN!
People are stacked because playing together with noobs is a pain in the ass. Really, especially if they are on your ship. You know that, everyone knows that, and some people are just not willing to risk because '
vets do want to have fun too'. But most vets that I know try to bring non-serious loadouts for stacked matches, like all banshee mob or all flak spire. We are not willing to like fly into the wall to help them kill us, but we are willing to have some handicap for the sake of the game. Because most vets don't find crushing noobs that fun either.
Many times vets try to be helpful, I'm sure that when asked ALMOST ALL of them will give any noob the best advice they can, but when they try to delicately say i.e. "Pal, this loadout is not very good, because ... " they are responded with "F0ck off m9, I just play for fun, Imma not a tryhuurd like yeh". So yeah, we just stop caring, really.
Try to look up nanoduckling's posts, he actually made clan dedicated entirely for helping noobs and he did it for a while but his experiences turned him off very much, so don't put all of the blame on vets.
Edit: Also, sales weeks are unbearable for me. I always wait untill player population drops back to 400-500 and then play. At least since (apparently) I know my patience and I can't help - I won't make things worse.