Who is Rethburn?

[Sonaes]

[HamsterIV]

A more fitting question would be "What is Rethburn?"

[RethBurn]

I'̫͎̙̤m͞ ̼a̴̗ ̻͟p̜̗͚͚̙͈r̷̼̗̺̩̜e̞̹͙͞t̫̮͡t͓͙̝̯̘ͅy͈̳͡ ̸̩̱̞b̻ḁ̱̦̕ḓ͎̲̼̕ p̬̥̠̮͕i̜̦̥̟l͍̭̜ͅo͚̲̥͇͙t̜͍̭̻ ̦̻̼̩w̖̞͚i͏͇t̪̣̪̖̹͍̯h̙̪̞̼̲ ̢à̜̙ te͇͜n̴̺̩̝͙d̼e̻͔nc̸͙̞y̥͚̼̩ͅ ̟͕͍̠͚̫t̡͍̼̬̝̠ͅo̝̹̭̗̤ ͍̦h̯̗̗͖̙i͚͞t̻̕ ̦͇͔̥t̤̖̪h̙̮̯̭̮̹e̯̹̙͕ ̣͉͈̭̞̩͚b̸̹̥͙̖̟͇̞ǫ̯͓̦͖̯͓o̪̯̞̙̭͘z̡͔̱̮͇ͅe͚͠ o͔̼͈̪̘͇̮n̻̮̥̜̹͔ ̬̥̞͚͍̘͘w̠̬̺͎̕e̢̥̹̣̹̞̬͈ẹ̜̝̞̖̝͇̀k̮e̞̙̹̮ͅͅn͉̠̯ḓ͟s̜̝̺̳̀ án̴̯̘̟͙d͖̯̜́ͅͅ ҉̠̙p̻͚̥r̝̞͝e͈t̺̤̹̮̦̣e̯̰̞̱͚̱n͠d̰̣̫͡ ͙̜̟̟͕͇͠ͅI̤̠̣̖͈ͅ'͔͖̹͙̺̕m̭̕ ͉̥̫g̰̼͇̕o̥̝͈̘ͅo̰̺͍͙̟͜d ̦͔̳ͅͅa͏̙͎t̸͚͉̝ͅ ̜̖̬͠t̳͙͍̥h̩̮̜͕̯̗e̝̠̞͚̯̯̩ ̨̣̣g̼̠̯͙̝͖a̢̯̬̫̮̳ͅṃ̸̟̩e͚͈̺.̨͙̖̱̝

[Kamoba]

The Rethburn is something you only summon when in Dire need...
Oh my god its here!!!
*Runs into a wall.*

[callsign striker]

I may not have the best of vision (dust clouds and engine smoke) but even I can see a wall that was right there. but still rethburn. reth burn. burn. I like the smell of gasoline. stuff burns. do you like the smell of gasoline?

[Riggatto]

Look deep within your soul and attempt to answer; Why is Rethburn?

[callsign striker]

look deep in my soul? hold on been a while the last time I did that........ I found it!!! the name is to remind me that burning things is fun and awesome.

[macmacnick]

If you want, I can break out my second-rate slashfiction and sacrifice it to summon Reth for you.

[Kamoba]

I think the question is less "Who is Rethburn" but more of a "what is a Rethburn" or "What does it mean to be a Rethburn."

[HamsterIV]

Look deep within your soul and attempt to answer; Why is Rethburn?

Rethburn is a punishment send by an unforgiving god to a world that has failed him in so many ways. We deserve nothing but suffering for what we have done. That is Why Rethburn.

I think the question is less "Who is Rethburn" but more of a "what is a Rethburn" or "What does it mean to be a Rethburn."

To be a Rethburn is to know the worst the human soul has to offer and in the darkest of nights, to feed off it. The slashfic is the smallest glimpses in what it means to be a Rethburn. If the full hatred and fury of Rethburn's soul were to be put on paper the ensuing fire storm would turn the surrounding area to ash for 100 miles in every direction. The last time Rethburn exposed himself in such a manner it caused the death of the dinosaurs and the birth of Shinkurex (whom all things can be blamed upon).

[RethBurn]

The book of Gabriel 4:1-8:

And Howard banished RethBurn from the garden of Mines, for he was made from a rib of Phoenix and a being of dark. He knew despair, and thus when Zill and Yiski had their children; he whispered to Shinkurex.
"Shinkurex, your brother is more liked than you. You must take this dagger I give you, and you must slay your brother. He does not deserve Howard's love like you do, Shinkurex". And thus the boy took the dagger from the bandage-wrapped hands swept under a ragged cloak. And he stabbed his Brother; In-Spire-d.

Howard did not see the death of In-Spire-d, and he thundered his voice. He proclaimed unto Shinkurex: "Where is thy brother?"
Shinkurex answered: "Spires don't fit into the meta. Fix it, Howard"
Upon hearing this, Howard became furious, he bestowed the mark of Blame upon Shinkurex and said: "I now curse you to carry that sentiment to your grave. You shall be blamed for the death of any and all, for the trees withering and for the poverty of orphans. You shall never know catharsis, for you carry the sin of all."

And then Howard turned to RethBurn, and boomed once more: "Did you do this?"
He stood paralyzed by the omnipotent's power, and his answer dwarfed the mighty ruler: "I mean. Spires are still the most effective for flak builds, they are nice in Dunes?" And God smiled, he forgave his creation on the spot, and gave him the Hammer of a Moderator. He then bestowed the Defiler to be the guardian of the dead, sending people to their demise in the forgotten lands of the Banned realm.

[Kamoba]

Trying to explain why I burst out laughing to my wife with this^ as the answer...

Never have you seen such bewilderment before... XD

[Mod Josie]

The book of Gabriel 4:1-8:

And Howard banished RethBurn from the garden of Mines, for he was made from a rib of Phoenix and a being of dark. He knew despair, and thus when Zill and Yski had their children; he whispered to Shinkurex.
"Shinkurex, your brother is more liked than you. You must take this dagger I give you, and you must slay your brother. He does not deserve Howard's love like you do, Shinkurex". And thus the boy took the dagger from the bandage-wrapped hands swept under a ragged cloak. And he stabbed his Brother; In-Spire-d.

Howard did not see the death of In-Spire-d, and he thundered his voice. He proclaimed unto Shinkurex: "Where is thy brother?"
Shinkurex answered: "Spires don't fit into the meta. Fix it, Howard"
Upon hearing this, Howard became furious, he bestowed the mark of Blame upon Shinkurex and said: "I now curse you to carry that sentiment to your grave. You shall be blamed for the death of any and all, for the trees withering and for the poverty of orphans. You shall never know catharsis, for you carry the sin of all."

And then Howard turned to RethBurn, and boomed once more: "Did you do this?"
He stood paralyzed by the omnipotent's power, and his answer dwarfed the mighty ruler: "I mean. Spires are still the most effective for flak builds, they are nice in Dunes?" And God smiled, he forgave his creation on the spot, and gave him the Hammer of a Moderator. He then bestowed the Defiler to be the guardian of the dead, sending people to their demise in the forgotten lands of the Banned realm.

Ah, I remember this. It was a Tuesday - Good times.
It's a shame that the Book of Gabriel only really tells the story on the ground. You don't get to hear all of the great stuff that our gods and demigods come out with when not being watched.

[callsign striker]

rethburn is my last hope in a world full of moonshine

[MagKel]

I may not have the best of vision (dust clouds and engine smoke) but even I can see a wall that was right there. but still rethburn. reth burn. burn. I like the smell of gasoline. stuff burns. do you like the smell of gasoline?

I call Moonshine