Guns Of Icarus Online
Off-Topic => The Lounge => Topic started by: Squidslinger Gilder on January 01, 2016, 04:39:19 pm
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Weird that I thought it was better than some of the prequels but bad enough I actually thought Lucas could do better.
If it wasn't for the supporting cast and some of the dialogue, Episode 7 is literally one of the worst Star Wars movies ever. Barely squeaks by Episode 2. Holy crap it is swiss cheese story with an antagonist that needs to wait another 10yrs till he gets some pubes and doesn't need pampers anymore.
First Order vs the Resistance is like watching a bad Gundam episode where we see two former powers duking it out in a never ending war while the rest of the galaxy rolls their eyes and doesn't give a damn. In fact there is such an episode in Gundam: AGE where the protagonists come across this battle still being fought by a handful of old men and its just pathetic.
Why has the First Order even gotten so big if it's ran by a bunch of brats who look like they are still waiting for their balls to drop? Assuming Snoak is Darth Plaguis like others suspect but really...Snoak? Don't even try to hide him or make him mysterious? What is this? Run out of awesome names so you rip something that seems like it should be in Pokemon?
Then..WTF Planet Deathstar beam destroys worlds in real time completely negating speed of light limits? Why are people on one world viewing other worlds in other systems blowing up? Is it the same system? If its the same system, why the flipping monkey crack did they have to hyperspace anywhere?
For that matter why is there even a planet sized deathstar now? Why? NAN DE!!!!! It's so stupid. Where are the huge fleets that the First Order should have? Don't tell me they've blown their entire budget on that planetstar and now they have what...1 star destroyer? How the hell is that scary or imposing? You can't expand a new Empire with one battleship!
I can see why Abrams wanted to continue doing Star Wars movies because he left it so haphazard that literally there is almost no way the next director is going to pull off a decent Episode 8. If the director does, holy crap they'll pull off a miracle.
Anyways, anyone else feel like venting about Fart Awakens? Son of a...they could have at least used some extended universe story and characters. A Jedi Homeworld that is not Tython? Really...no Tython?
*Makes mental note to someday kick J.J. Abrams in the crotch :D
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Google "Star Wars 7, The Fallen Hero."
I dare you.
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One word: TRAITOR.
But honestly, with plot holes THIS big, there is no plot at all. Just the copy+paste of episode 4. Only senseslessly rushed as fuck.
And with soooo leigitimate female character:
Finn: Hurr Durr I'm a big shot in Resistance
Rey: Cool!
Finn: Hurr Durr I actually don't belong to Resistence - I'm a fugitive Order's bitch
Rey: Fine by me, I have absolutly no problem with you lying to everyone, especially me!
...J.J. are you fucking nuts? Have you ever TALKED to a woman? -.-
Not to mention a bad guy, who starts being QUITE intimidating to say the least... and thenn he takes out his helmet - THREE FUCKING TIMES IN A MOVIE - so we can find out how much of an emo cunt he actually is.
Also, I feel they wanted to seem "mysterious" in some moments, but they failed miserably due to the fast pacing - WAY TOO FAST PACING - so when your brain begins to process all you've just saw, the movie is two scenes forward...
Not to mention the ending. PFFFFT. Fun fact, Hamill got few times more money then actress playing as Rey.
GG.
gg wp capitalistic pigs.
Seriously, I believe somebody should make a montage of famous Heavy Rain's "Jason" bug, but instead put a similarly prolonged "TRAAAAAITOR" in it.
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SW is overrated, good movies but overrated :)
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Yeah I was so hoping Finn was going to get killed off by the end. Injecting that attitude was terrible. The role wasn't really cast well. If they wanted an African American actor, they should have gotten the guy from Super Girl. He's fantastic and doesn't hurr durr.
Heck most of the roles were cast rather crappily other than Rey. Why do all the First Order dicks look like they've barely grown any pubes as well? That admiral guy? What the hell is he? What is this, Space Nazi Boy Scouts? Maybe Plaguis likes being surrounded by young boys...I dunno.
Hamill I've always hated in Star Wars but I like him in Wing Commander. Where he actually grows a grungie beard and looks decent for the part. Looking forward to him playing the old cuss Wing Commander in Star Citizen. Previews of it looked fantastic. Just episode 7...so stupid that he doesn't even have any lines. Just stands there giving Rey the evil eye.
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Just stands there giving Rey the evil eye.
Yeah, like:
"You're bothering me" Arcanum? Geoffrey Torelond-Ashe? Anyone? No? Ugh...
"Shoo"
"Shoo, goddammit!"
"Just, just twat off"
"I spent twenty fucking staring at nothing - if I wanted any change in that matter, I'd go and search myself"
"Goddammit, you brought me THAT lightsaber - what else? Maybe a hand, I lost with it? Or carcasses of twenty children my father killed with it? Silly lass..."
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I'd pay to see that ending.
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im looking forward to rey teaching luke about the force, since shes such a powerful jedi knowing shit without practice :)
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im looking forward to rey teaching luke about the force, since shes such a powerful jedi knowing shit without practice :)
I know seriously...
But of course given that JJ can't write star wars worth shit, most likely she's the estrogen version of Luke. Cept memory wiped and then sent away to some horrible place to endure hardships till she can be revealed to the universe!! Why can't any of these people have a normal childhood or backstory? Farm girl growing up on Dantooine...sent away to study under Luke and become a Jedi master. Then the crap happens and then you can butcher the family or something to trigger a light vs dark moment.
Instead of putting Luke on the run, put her. Or them both. Luke gets harem ending...everyone wins!
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this is the end of the saga that revolves around the skywalker family, thats why she cant be a farm girl.
Disney has no intentions of ending the story after episode 9. They are going to keep making things within the franchise, most likely some animated movies etc.
I'm actually looking forward to watching rogue one to see if its better than episode 7.
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Gilder I have a feeling you wouldn't have been happy with any possible movie. The only thing that would have satisfied you is if you wrote it yourself
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No I am perfectly happy with many movies. Last one I Netflix'd was Kingsman. Found it a tad cheesy but overall it didn't try to be more than it was. Enjoyed it. The movie knew it's identity and it wasn't terribly written. A few scenes rushed here and there can be forgiven.
Before that, Rogue Nation. Actually somewhat enjoyed that too. Especially because they didn't play it as predictably as I thought they would.
Star Wars...all you hear about it is raves. Disney is merchandising it to death. Heck commercials on TV the other night...I don't think there was one segment where Williams wasn't played in the background of the ad.
Lucas then throws a fit...personally it made me want to watch 7 more because if he hates it, then it'll be good. However by the end of the movie I found Lucas to be right on many points. Now Disney bent him over and breach loaded him full of "praise it or we crush you." So he's recanting and playing nice again.
Its hilarious that when I see critical reviews of 7...they go into all these things and more. Things which should label a movie as "garbage" yet they can't stop singing praises for 7 at the same time and encouraging people to see it. Sorry media but if you want to shovel feces into my mouth and call it chocolate you better at least make it taste somewhat like chocolate.
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No I am perfectly happy with many movies. Last one I Netflix'd was Kingsman. Found it a tad cheesy but overall it didn't try to be more than it was. Enjoyed it. The movie knew it's identity and it wasn't terribly written. A few scenes rushed here and there can be forgiven.
Before that, Rogue Nation. Actually somewhat enjoyed that too. Especially because they didn't play it as predictably as I thought they would.
Star Wars...all you hear about it is raves. Disney is merchandising it to death. Heck commercials on TV the other night...I don't think there was one segment where Williams wasn't played in the background of the ad.
Lucas then throws a fit...personally it made me want to watch 7 more because if he hates it, then it'll be good. However by the end of the movie I found Lucas to be right on many points. Now Disney bent him over and breach loaded him full of "praise it or we crush you." So he's recanting and playing nice again.
Its hilarious that when I see critical reviews of 7...they go into all these things and more. Things which should label a movie as "garbage" yet they can't stop singing praises for 7 at the same time and encouraging people to see it. Sorry media but if you want to shovel feces into my mouth and call it chocolate you better at least make it taste somewhat like chocolate.
Wow what an amazing amount of expertise and insight you have. We didn't know you were so involved and well informed.
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I'm talking specifically about star wars. I mean that I feel you wouldn't have liked any star wars 7 movie that was made.
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I was just talking about recently Dutch :P. Smart ass :P
Nah they could have done a Star Wars 7 I would have liked. I could forgive a lot of things. In the prequels I actually like Episode 1 if I ignore Jar Jar and the childish dialogue at times. Mostly because Lucas did the casting right and I'm a Liam fan. Episode 2 and 3 could not be forgiven very well because it just snowballed due to the worst possible choice to play Anakin along with the most awkward romance scenes ever. Had Lucas convinced Dicaprio to play Anakin, I think the prequels would have been salvageable. Dicaprio actually looked like the episode 1 kid and knows how to act unlike Hayden.
Episode 7 would have been good, had they not tossed out the extended universe. Just worked with it. Heck if they would have had Kyle Katarn on screen for even a brief cameo, I'd have been satisfied with 7. But no, Disney blows chunks.
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I'm not attacking you mate. But do you notice what I'm saying? "it would've been good, if they'd done what I say here"
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I'm not attacking you mate. But do you notice what I'm saying? "it would've been good, if they'd done what I say here"
technically most of gilder's posts about goio are that too.
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Episode 7 would have been good, had they not tossed out the extended universe. Just worked with it. Heck if they would have had Kyle Katarn on screen for even a brief cameo, I'd have been satisfied with 7. But no, Disney blows chunks.
I'm just trying to fugue out your taste in movies here, so don't take this personally, but to you, the only difference between a satisfying movie and one that "blows chucks" is a fanservice cameo?
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Katarn showing up would have meant they went with a much more interesting extended universe. Read between the lines. Heck same if they added Mara Jade or Thrawn. I just use Katarn as an example. Gotta take that example and understand what it really meant. Hence my earlier Tython reference. It would have legitimized The Old Republic storyline and provided a tie in that would have not only hit home for fans but also provided great story material for the future. You don't have to link directly to the Revan story to do something like this, just show a familiar world out of it. This is what it looks like 3000 years later/etc. Dantooine was fantastic in KOTOR part because we had never seen it in the movies and now we finally got to see it.
In fact had they done Dantooine instead of Tatooine rip off Jakku, it would have tied in with the original film and Leia's dialogue.
They didn't need to go back and retell Episode 4 to make 7. Clear this was all Disney's doing. Lucas was right in his tantrum. Disney should have broke new ground. They could have stayed retro and still done that. But they played it safe and it sucks.
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katarn is no longer canon
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A propos things not being canon.
I love how they named a character Ben Solo, who is the son of Han Solo, and happens to also fall to dark side.
HMMMMM.
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Gilder, I've found this alternative ending on 9Gag just now:
(http://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/aeGGngO_700b_v1.jpg)
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George Lucas Rey Sith ending...
Luke bores a cold stare into Rey...Rey holds out lightsaber...Luke continues to stare...Ewok Binks jumps out like a face hugger and latches onto Luke's face. Rey reveals she's really Plaguis.
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Also, for some reason I find this fragment dubbed in german somehow hilarious... (http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x3j6xn4)
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I'd love to hear the Japanese dub. I could maybe actually stand Kylo if he was in Japanese.
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I liked it
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I liked it
Ditto.
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I liked it
Han using the bowcaster was prolly my favorite parts.
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I liked it
Ditto.
Same with the overwhelming majority making it solidly in third place (http://www.rottentomatoes.com/franchise/star-wars-saga/) on the highest rated Star Wars films. Don't forget that the original trilogy had its share of negative reviews (http://www.washingtonian.com/blogs/afterhours/movies/read-washingtonians-reviews-of-the-original-star-wars-trilogy.php) and poor content. I won't comment on the new movie because I haven't seen it yet.
Remember the attack on the Death Star (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WBG2rJZGW8) in IV? Let me refresh your memory. 30 Rebels in fighters (X Wings) and close support bombers (Y Wings) attack the Death Star with a population of over 1 million (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_Star). The Empire is alerted to their presence but doesn't scramble any of its thousands of available fighters. The Rebels start a ground attack in which the anti-aircraft guns of the Empire prove completely ineffective and never score a hit. The Rebels continue attacking for a while until the Empire finally scrambles a single squad of fighters. This ends in a decisive rebel victory with all Tie fighters destroyed. The Y Wings begin their bombing run in which they fly down a tight corridor in the face of heavy AA with no fighter escort. Darth Vader and his two wingmen launch and engage the defenseless Y Wings and destroy them. A second group of X Wings is sent into the same corridor at seemingly the same position again without escort. They are defeated by Darth Vader without any attempt at resistance or evasion. The third and final group is again sent into the same corridor at the same position and are about to be destroyed when Han Solo flies in to save the day. Luke uses the force to destroy the Death Star. The end
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But at least Lucas tried to explain why the Empire does nothing. They are arrogant asses who don't really see them as a threat. Tie Fighters were also shieldless crap. Incredibly cheap to build but quick and effective in numbers.
The Y wings were defenseless because their shields were on double front to soak up the AA fire. Another part explained. For those that haven't played X-Wing...double front means all the shields are to the front and there is nothing behind you.
The lack of escort is part due to the fact that they don't have room to really move much in that trench. Besides that the rest of the units were busy taking on the rest of the Ties. Vader of course exploits this and takes advantage of it. Notice he really takes his sweet time. He doesn't come in guns blazing all over the place. He takes his time to line up his shots because he knows he can.
Why don't they evade him? Simply because at that point it is do or die. Breaking away and leaving the trench means they might not get another shot. Remember Vader is a famed pilot too. Its a checkmate situation. What can the other ships really do? Pull away? No it wouldn't help. Vader would stay on the leader.
As far as the Death Star goes, again a hint is dropped that they really don't consider the rebels a threat or more likely, small ships a threat. Again it's arrogance but it is either hinted well or explained. At the most the rebellion has one frigate at the time of Episode IV and a lot of transports or corvettes. If you play the X-Wing game this becomes very clear. Heck the Death Star missions were the only ones I didn't finish. Freaken things were insanely tough. You just have no real support and everything is a race against time.
Another factor to consider, but this is only really revealed in the games and later lore, is that the Imperial fighters were not ultra seasoned. They put down rebellions or just waste people here and there but they don't really have any major foe to fight. Stormtrooper accuracy is a good joke on this. The rebellion fighters are from day one put into the fight. They get seasoned much quicker.
This somewhat goes back to the Clone Wars too. Clones beat droids for similar reasons. Specially the dumb droids of the Feds. They learn, adapt, and get that seasoning.
So yeah, IV had issues but just those ones there are ones that are either hinted or explained. They can also be inferred rather easily. But here with JJ you've got big plot holes being left unanswered. This article mentions some of the big ones: http://io9.gizmodo.com/everything-thats-wrong-with-star-wars-the-force-awaken-1751756919
Would Lucas have left the same major holes? Maybe? I dunno. I remember some of the cut scenes of the prequels being moments where I thought, "why the hell did you cut that out?!" "It would have made so much better sense." But overall I think at times he tried to go into too much detail and ended up boring the fans.
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does not carry any weight in the film.
This sentence, repeating throughout the article (I THINK, I'm still reading it), might describe pretty damn well what I think about the newest Star Wars film - paced too fast, so fast, that NOTHING carry any emotional or whatever weight. I just couldn't give single tiny fuck mostly...
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I just found this on 9Fag:
(http://img-9gag-fun.9cache.com/photo/anNNp9E_460s_v1.jpg)
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I finally got around to seeing the movie yesterday. There were several plot holes you could drive a bus through, but overall I was satisfied with it. Having studies sword fighting for over a decade I was prepared to be let down by the light saber fight, and the movie lived up to my low expectations. However from a plot perspective I saw something very interesting. During the Rey vs Kylo fight at the end of the movie Rey is loosing, and understandably so, this is her first time holding a light saber. Then they get to that dramatic cliff scene where Kylo says she needs a teacher and does the creepy force glare at her. Last time he creepy force glared Rey she learned that he feared not being as strong as Vader. My theory is that when Kylo was trying to persuade her to accept him as her teacher she was downloading everything Kylo knew about swordsmanship strait from his brain. After that moment she get significantly better with the weapon and I think purposefully strikes Kylo in ways that will wound but not kill him. Leah would be pissed if she found out Ren killed her boy, and nobody wants that.
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So Rey is actually a female Kakashi.
Now that change I could get behind. Rey the copycat Jedi. Just give her a sharingan and we're good to go.
(http://i280.photobucket.com/albums/kk184/akaPrinceofDarkness/kakashi_thumbs_up.jpg)
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Just give her a sharingan and we're good to go.
...start speaking like a normal human being, or I'll bash you with a plank.
:p
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Kylo is still a crap swordsman, but a little training is better than none. I interpret the fight as a mediocre fighter beating on two novices (Fin and Rey) until Rey downloads Kylo's mediocre weapon knowledge from an unsecured Jedi mind meld. Then she purposefully inflicts a series of no fatal wounds because she didn't want Leah to deal with the loss of both Han and Kylo on the same day.
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Ya know it would then make sense why Luke just gives her the death stare...
He knows...
That's why he left her to die on Jakku. GASP!!
SHE WAS GOING TO TAKE LUKE'S SEXY JUTSU!!! SHOCKU DESU!!!
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I consider this a good place to rant about the new movie, so here comes another one.
Luke Skywalker began his narrative as a teenager in a two parent house hold. His family had a stable source of income and were it not for the heavy handed antics of the empire he could have lived a long uneventful life on Tatooine.
Han Solo was a ship captain with a crew that undertook jobs of questionable legality or a crime syndicate. While he is shown as being in trouble with the Hutts, it would be safe to assume he had a fairly successful career as an independent contractor prior to the events of the film and if he had made a few different choices he could continue making a living moving high value cargo.
Leah Organa was the daughter of presumably wealthy nobility who got involved in political activism to right the wrongs being done to other people. Her contacts within the Senate probably mean that she could have lived a live of comfort and luxury if she had decided to accept the status quo.
My point is that at the time the original films were made these were the characters that the makers felt the audience could invest themselves in. Given that it was the late 70's it makes a lot of sense. Two parent families who owned land and sometimes business were portrayed as the societal norm. Prohibition had ended one generation ago and tales of the dashing rouge who flaunted government rules about alcohol were no doubt among the tales the generation who made star wars grew up on. The protests against the Vietnam War were also a recent memory, and most of the protesters were from affluent/connected families that could send their kids to college and avoid the draft.
Now lets look at the origin stories of the new cast of star wars:
Fin grew up in the military having never know his parents. It is implied that he was sold to the First Order at an early age, so even if he had stayed with his parents he would not have been welcome let alone loved. He and every one of his peers know their job and their future involves being a storm trooper. It is only after he watches one of his squad mates die in his arms and is told to fire upon unarmed prisoners does he question his place in the world. Also what kind of crap sack world is poverty so prevalent that you could build an army of disposable shock troopers by purchasing unwanted children?
Rey was abandoned by her parents or care takers old enough to have memories of the events. While she has a place to rest at night it would hardly be considered a home. She lives hand to mouth on the whims of a scrap dealing middleman. She is one injury away from loosing her ability to collect scrap and therefor eat. Her life mirrors the life of many children in Vietnam and other former war zones who scour the jungle for scrap metal left over from the war and occasionally get injured or killed when they blunder into unexploded ordinance or mines.
Poe is a legitimate good man, but we don't know much about his history aside from being connected enough to General Leah to be sent on a risky mission. At any rate his screen time is minor and he acts as more of a foil than a main character.
Kylo/Ben is born into a powerful family with promising future ahead of him. He was probably being groomed by his uncle to take over the new Jedi order. Yet he decides to hook up with some people his parents and uncle hate. Then emulate a grandfather he has never met but every one assures him was a powerful, respected, and feared individual.
These are the characters the makers of the new film think will resonate with this generation, and for the most part is seems to be working. Yet their origins are and potential futures are bleaker than their predecessors. What does that say about our culture?
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Exactly why I barely watch any western entertainment anymore. I'd rather watch a rehashed anime based on another show, which took ideas from another show, on top of some classic anime...than sit five minutes watching western entertainment tell me I'm not a normal person unless I'm some overly traumatized, verbally abused, adult who's goal in life is to sleep with anything that moves and father another generation of kids with even worse issues.
VII is the culmination of every horrific Disney story we've had for 50 yrs. Really, analyze Disney stories and you'll wonder what was wrong with your parents for letting you watch them.
At least in anime they have a reason for showing the home as a mess with fathers never home and mothers either working or overwhelmed. Kids get raised by the group of friends they establish which is pretty much what has happened there as their family unit structure has broken down. But, they still know how to run shows with main characters showing intact family units that, surprise surprise, don't end in everyone dying in some horrific way.
Trouble with western studios is they do not know how to not run Disney stories. Because those in charge are very fearful of trying new ideas. It's all about if something will sell or not and Disney has made a lot of money off their formulaic settings. Course eastern studios do similar, but theres often more titles that take risks. Next thing you know, new genres start or another anime copies it but does things right where another fumbles. They're very quick to ride the next flavor of the month where we sit in a flavor of the month for years till it's done to death and studios decide "reboot time!"